Picnic-time

It’s June ag’in, an’ in my soul I feel the fillin’ joy
That’s sure to come this time o’ year to every little boy;
For, every June, the Sunday-schools at picnics may be seen,
Where “fields beyont the swellin’ floods stand dressed in livin’ green”;
Where little girls are skeered to death with spiders, bugs, and ants,
An’ little boys get grass-stains on their go-to meetin’ pants.
It’s June ag’in, an’ with it all what happiness is mine-
There’s goin’ to be a picnic, an’ I’m goin’ to jine!

One year I jined the Baptists, an’ goodness! how it rained!
(But grampa says that that’s the way “baptizo” is explained.)
And once I jined the ‘Piscopils an’ had a heap o’ fun-
But the boss of all the picnics was the Presbyteriun!
They had so many puddin’s, sallids, sandwidges, an’ pies,
That a feller wisht his stummick was as hungry as his eyes!
Oh, yes, the eatin’ Presbyteriuns give yer is so fine
That when they have a picnic, you bet I’m goin’ to jine!

But at this time the Methodists have special claims on me,
For they’re goin’ to give a picnic on the 21st, D. V.;
Why should a liberal universalist like me object
To share the joys of fellowship with every friendly sect?
However het’rodox their articles of faith elsewise may be,
Their doctrine of fried chick’n is a savin’ grace to me!
So on the 21st of June, the weather bein’ fine,
They’re goin’ to give a picnic, and I’m goin’ to jine!