letting you go is harder than diminishing you into
“just something that happened to me”
“nothing big really”.
and while I know that you are my body’s response to a negative event,
you are quite possibly
the world’s worst roommate.
I have changed my entire world for you.
I have ruined friendships,
cut my hair,
grew my hair,
all for you.
All in the hope that you would
And how do you repay me, Trauma?
You spill nail polish on my psyche’s new rug,
You drink all the norepinephrine in the fridge,
You forget to feed my hippocampus,
And you overwater my amygdala.
And you know what?
You have kept me up one too many nights
thinking about the feeling of greasy hands.
You have left the tangled memories of suffocation
on my shower wall for the last time.
This is the final time you will ever
eat my leftover happiness.
So this is it.
I will not
“give it time”.
I will not
“let it go”.
I will not allow you to
make me a prisoner
in my own body
Your bags are on the curb
and I have changed the locks.
My name is on the lease of my still-here-body
and you have no claim here.
Goodbye and good riddance,